Loose Ends
What a day!
Susan Nienow

I thought I would scoot out in my sweats with no makeup, run a few errands and go to the gym. After all, everyone at the gym will be dressed for exercise, and who goes to the grocery and drug stores on a Monday morning?

While I was looking for the plumpest pea pods, I ran into a couple I haven't seen in years. I tried to scoot around the corner and hide behind the oranges, but Ed, bless his heart, yelled, "Hey Susan," and came tearing over. Everybody turned to see who warranted such a welcome.

I turned red, which makes me look like I had an encounter with a runaway blush brush. We had a chat about where the kids are now, and before they could launch into what their two-year-old granddog learned to do, I mumbled something about being in a hurry to get to the gym and headed for the lettuce.

I was deciding whether to buy bread with three or five grams of fiber when the lady next to me said, "Oh, hi!"

Since I only run into her when I have spilled my last meal down my front, I checked my shirt and picked off the dried cereal. She dresses for the grocery store like I dress for a wedding. And she never has a thread hanging from her hem or a sleeve that has dragged through the gravy.

We exchanged dry cleaning stories, and I checked out.

Next stop was the gym. I was halfway through my row of machines before I noticed the woman on the machine in front of me. She was standing up with her arms out to the side, pulling on handles attached to cords. I watched, waiting for the scream as she wrenched her arm or as she let go of one side only to be slammed against the other. She gracefully finished the last set and let go of the handles. Nothing happened to her.

I closed my mouth and looked at the machine I was sitting on - backwards. I looked around to see if anyone noticed, got up and sat on the machine the right way. I wonder if it's obvious that I'm not a natural. When I finished those two sets, I moved to the next machine. Legs over this and under that - I checked the picture on the side of the machine. I did one set and part of the next before I cried "uncle."

I headed for the bike to do some cardio. Why do I always get the squeaky one? The other three on bikes turned to look at me as I slid off and got on the next one. I looked for the button that said, "Makes you look like a pro."

A stranger in a strange land, I headed for the locker room where I sat on the floor and tried to read the numbers on the lock on my locker without my glasses.