What's in when it comes to saying "I do"
By Joan Tupponce CONTRIBUTING WRITER

No matter whether it's a large affair or a small, intimate gathering, you want your wedding to be special, full of memories that will last a lifetime - that perfect blend of the trends of the day with the traditions of yesteryear. So what are the current trends in the "I do" department?

When it comes to the wedding service itself, many couples are personalizing their nuptials, says Lariza Rife who co-owns Detail by Detail with Lisa Borchert.

"There is more of a focus on the couple," she explained. "For example, the couple may choose to add a signature drink to the reception [menu]."

Intimate settings are gaining popularity with brides and grooms in Chesterfield.

"We're seeing a lot of people getting married in their family homes," noted Jennifer Mc- Bride, owner of Occasions. "It's a cozier atmosphere. People appreciate that homey feel."

McBride suggests that brides who marry at home keep an eye on the weather. "It can be unpredictable," she warned. "You have to be proactive. If you're having a ceremony at home, you may need to have a tent [available]."

Outdoor weddings, whether they are at home or elsewhere, are on the rise, confirms Rife.

"We're seeing a lot of vineyard weddings," she said. "Couples are taking advantage of the natural landscape."

"It helps with the cost when you can use nature [as a backdrop]," adds Borchert.

Nancy Tucker, owner of An Event Extraordinaire, is noticing an increase in destination weddings.

"Any out-of-state location," she said. "It could be the Bahamas. It could be Orlando, Fla."

When it comes to wedding dresses, strapless may still be the trend but many brides are adding a small touch to the bare look like an off-the-shoulder strap or lace overlay cap sleeves.

"You're also seeing sashes that add color to white and ivory dresses," Tucker said. "Corset-type fitted bodices and bustling in the front of the skirt as well as the back are also trends."

Popular colors for the wedding party at the moment include brown, pink, lavender and shades of metallic.

"Typically you'll pick up the colors of fashion in the wedding," noted Korri McFann, manager of marketing for weddings and honeymoons at Walt Disney World.

Bridesmaid dresses that were once the brunt of many jokes have become much more fashionable over the years.

"Sometimes the bride will just pick the color for the dress and let the bridesmaids pick their own dress, one that they look good in," McBride said. "That makes it more interesting."

Reception trends include extended cocktail hours and food stations for different ethnic foods, according to Rife and Borchert. McBride is also seeing an increase in the number of sit-down dinners being offered after the wedding.

"People like the formality and the organization," she explained.

They also enjoy chowing down on the wedding cake, which today can be as unique as the bride and groom.

"We're seeing more elements of color and more florals being added to the cake," said Rife.

Fondant icing is a thing of the past, adds Tucker.

"Pastry artists have learned how to deal with frosting so that it looks like fondant," she said. "As far as cake toppers, people are using everything from jewels to Swarovski crystal or sterling silver hearts. It's not your standard bride and groom on top."

All of the wedding planners note that the groom's cake is making a comeback.

"It's a Southern tradition that is returning," explained McBride. "People usually cut the groom's cake either after the wedding cake or at the reception or rehearsal dinner."

Groom's cakes are typically smaller than the wedding cake.

"They can be very clever," said McFann. "We've seen some unique designs. For example, one groom who was a fireman had a fire-hydrant groom's cake."

Another wedding trend relates to the environment.

"People are using recycled paper for invitations," Borchert said. "They are giving little trees as wedding favors, something that can be planted. Some [attendees] are making donations instead of giving gifts."

All of this planning can be overwhelming. That's why a growing number of couples rely on the sound advice they receive from a wedding planner.

"You want someone who can help you plan your special day," McFann said.

Because of their business, wedding planners are privy to the latest trends in weddings. They know which trends are passé and which are the latest rage.

Of course there are some things that never change like the folks who never RSVP to a wedding invitation.

"They just show up at the wedding," McBride said. "If you don't RSVP, we don't have a meal for you or a chair for you. It's just good manners and proper etiquette."