Loose Ends
Standards of success
Susan Nienow

I believe in keeping standards for all that I do. High, but shifting standards. They depend on the situation, my energy level, the length of my "to do" list and the weather. If it is an indoor job but balmy outside, I might slight my indoor chores to work in the garden. On the other hand, if it is 110 degrees in the shade, expect to see weeds in my flowerbed.

Back in the early days of my marriage, a visit from the in-laws meant I had to clean the house. But because it was the in-laws, I CLEANED THE HOUSE. Corners, windowsills, sliding glass doorsills, shower doors - if it was in the house, I cleaned it.

But if the visitor was an old college buddy of my other half's, I would have just given the family room and kitchen a once-over, working on the premise that young males don't know "clean." Since those days when I was in my cleaning prime, I have discovered that I don't really do "once-overs" well. I get stuck doing a perfect job on the kitchen cabinet doorknobs and don't get to the sticky spots on the floor and in the microwave or the crumbs behind the toaster oven.

Today, my cleaning standards are flexible depending on the visual acuity (read "age") of our guests and whether they will be sitting or standing. If they are all standing, the floor doesn't matter but dust on the furniture does. If everyone is going to be sitting, they have a great view out the sliding glass doors and the carpets.

Now I know it isn't just young males who don't know "clean." I can drop my standards several levels if the guests are all male. No disrespect meant. They just don't care about a few crumbs.

Through the years I have learned that putting fresh flowers in the guest bathroom is a great distraction. People automatically think I have spent the day cleaning. So now I just skip the cleaning and get flowers.

I have standards for other things in my life, too. I keep the family calendar and try not to miss more than three or four appointments in a year. Or a little less than a year. Part of my success is due to my decision to never make an appointment for a Monday. I always missed those. Now my success rate is higher.

All vacations have all been planned with my standards in mind - no camping without fresh sheets, air conditioning, screens and a private shower. I like those little soap and shampoo samples, too.

Years before I quit cooking altogether, I learned that it was safer for me to have people over for dinner cooked on the grill (by my other half) or for hors d'oeuvres, so I could ruin one or two of them, and no one would know. As far as the outside world was concerned, my standards for entertaining stayed high. And I never served the things that didn't turn out. Really.